Scott Degelman’s writing
December 13th, 2007Children’s ARK has many talented people on staff.
One of those is our Admissions guy, Scott Degelman. His writing is powerful and beautiful. Below are some of Scott’s more moving poems. Enjoy!
It’s Not Okay!
Robb stole cars since he was eight, We can leave our souls unfettered.
Crimes meant to retaliate Some may claim that such is better,
Against parental disarray. But if their fates don’t tear us apart,
Yet Robb’s choices were not okay. We don’t love kids with God’s own heart.
Eddie’s father beat and kicked him. God keeps angels to protect them,
Eddie seeks solace as a rape victim. Until the sting of choice infects them
Eddie wonders if he’s gay. And they, down into darkness, sway.
Eddie’s horror was not okay. Their souls lost are not okay.
Devon loved to laugh and smile, In them, we dare try re-direct
But circumstance from his drug file The brunt of all past year’s neglect.
Brought his premature decay. Though some will count the fallen cost,
Devon’s death was not okay. God prefers that none be lost.
Toby’s mom was hooked on crack. Past accounts have left me sure
Toby bore on his young back Some of them will not endure
The job of tending his sister’s day. Beyond their teenage dumb mistakes.
Toby’s stress was not okay. Eternity is the end stakes.
Of his soul, his mouth forgets. Others walk into the light,
Hear him wield his deadly threats. Casting off their age-old fright
But hiding in this boy gone wild For the armor of God’s own wishes.
Is a tender, fragile child. Finding Christ and all His riches.
Sin created hate and death. Knowing Him is the only option.
Some kids feel that earthly breath His blood granted us adoption
Has no point, save hell’s advance. As sons on His glorious throne.
Their souls barely have a chance. None of us need feel alone.
And yet God created enough like minds The ocean of good is sailable.
To love kids for Him, till they find God’s grace is available
The soul inside which yearns to say, To all souls, well or poorly kept.
My failure is not okay. Failure we must not accept.
Sure the boys do have their choices. So until our Savior’s sweet return,
Heeding past and Spirit voices. Our poor hearts must rage and burn
But peace with their end fate can’t nearly For every child who has lost his way.
Suffice for us who love them dearly. One soul lost is not okay.
The Charge We Have
Be emboldened by humility.
Be strengthened by weakness.
Be blessed by your ability
To show Christ in meekness.
Be ready to forsake
All you once knew as love.
Be shrewd as a snake
And pure as a dove.
Be assured in your heart,
In fair and fowl weather,
God takes what’s apart
And welds it together.
Be excited in prayer.
Welcome the Spirit.
Continue to dare
When you don’t feel near It.
Laugh at the enemy.
Jesus has won.
But remember Gethsemane.
God’s will be done.
It’s us on the watchtower.
Spot sin and end it.
Bring Christ’s return hour.
Do not extend it.
Plant your own field.
Leave them to their tillage.
Make His glory revealed
In this global village.
His Spirit uplifts.
Our love He adores.
Receive His new gifts.
Take what is yours.
Students of the Boys
I made a decision, To go on a mission—And teach some young boys from God’s treasure.
Not that it mattered, My brain still in tatters—Apart from His love’s fullest measure.
The Center existed—And so I enlisted—Without any prior experience.
Warm hearts for hire, A chance to inspire—A gaggle of juvenile deviants.
Onward with power. Pray every hour—That each boy will know Christ as Savior.
Look to His glow—For the right face to show. Model Him by your behavior.
Nigh to a week—Exposed the first streak—Of my juvenile soul’s coated languor.
There in Room Four, He ripped my hard core—By exposing the brunt of my anger.
It happened so fast! Five seconds passed—And then I could pretend all was fine.
But he had seen through me. This boy now knew me—As yet one more charlatan swine.
I had sworn I’d rejoice—In the light of God’s voice. I vowed to be Satan’s accuser.
Yet look at the toll. In my quest for control, I became yet another abuser.
I must now retire, A cold heart for hire. A teacher’s attempt fell for naught.
The pit of disgrace, My issues in my face. I, not they, had been taught.
Oh Lord, woe is me! It’s easy to see—I’m just not cut out for this task.
But as my heart shared, Jesus prepared—To distill my own tarnished flask.
Weeks turned to years—And amid many tears—This soul never stopped fighting.
One special child—Brought a tear-filled smile—When he taught me of love via biting.
He bit me in the morning—With no initial warning—Just venting parental frustration.
As I later tucked him in, A yearning within—Elicited this contemplation.
O God, who won’t slumber, You know the number—Of times in Your celestial sight
That I, with feigned brawn—Bit You at dawn—And heard You say “I love you” at night.
Great is the Whole—Of God’s love for my soul—To provoke these sins to confessing.
Vast is the truth—That these damaged youth—Have become my soul’s greatest blessing!
God said, “Don’t waiver. Savor the flavor—Of seeing your soul in the mirror.
Christ is your suitor—And I am your tutor. Perfect love casts out all fear.
Along this free ride—Forsake all your pride—And know that the boys are the gift.
If they keep you awake—it’s for My heart’s sake—That they thro’ your sin must sift.
See how I love them, Hover above them, As they enrapture me with great joys.
I have appointed, Spirit-anointed, Your life as set apart for the boys.”
Lo and behold, A story was told—Of a teacher who hadn’t been prudent,
Who may try in my ability—But confess in humility—That I am the e’er-failing student,
Ever conniving—Lunging and striving—To help build the nest of God’s care.
Hoping and praying, As Christ is heard saying, “Tend to My flock if you dare.”
Help me to learn. Help my heart turn—Aside from those ways which disgrace You.
Help them to see—As You set the kids free—That no false god can replace You.
Onward with power. I pray every hour—That each child will run to You faster.
Include me therein, A child of Your kin. I too am your student, Great Master.
And if I feel daunted, Sullen or haunted—By the task I’m assigned to perform,
I’ll think of Who’s steering, The waves God is clearing—As He wipes away every storm.
Modeling Christ
If I speak to them with vulgarity,
I’ll fill their mouths with decay.
But if I choose my words discretely,
They’ll know right things to say.
If my words are not full of truth,
They’ll think lies are needed for life.
But if I am a man of my word,
They’ll be honest even in strife.
If I give in to their fancies of culture,
I add credence to a defeated plan.
But if I set limits they cannot cross,
They will one day understand.
If I disobey authority,
They’ll model that ability.
But if I am submissive,
They’ll know respect for humility.
If I am covetous of the world,
I’ll teach them to sin in envy.
But if I am thankful regardless,
They’ll always have more than plenty.
If I speak negatively of others,
They’ll become chalk-full of slander.
But if my speech shows only kindness,
They may give grace a gander.
If I react to them in anger,
They’ll see a painful reminder.
But if I respond to hate with mercy,
They’ll learn to be that much kinder.
If I run at first sign of trouble,
They’ll cry and say, deja vu.
But if I hold on to them in love,
Then maybe, through me, they’ll see You.
Put to Use
How much grace has been instilled
Through our testimony to the One?
How many folks have not been killed
In part because of things we’ve done?
How many prayers have been anointed
Beyond the blessings we remember?
How many gangs are disappointed
Because we gave them one less member?
How much work above and beyond
Enters us into our Father’s praise?
How much love makes a boy respond
To change all of his errant ways?
How many years of quiet labor
Expand God’s Kingdom like He craves?
How much duty to our neighbor
Plays a part in each life He saves?
How much does the enemy hate
The fact that Christ has him defeated?
How much does one child’s fate
Break hearts beyond what needs repeated?
How much hope at first admission
Cures a troubled child so noted?
How much Spirit opposition
Deters a Shepherd here devoted?
How many subtle smiles we give
Bear fruit which we will never know?
How many abandoned lives we live
Succeed to ease one child’s woe?
How much prior years’ abuse
Requires our love to be expedient?
How much love was put to use
Because one couple were obedient?
How much God is our supply
Answers every question asked.
How we serve until we die
Brings each child’s light unmasked.
The Battle
We struggle and struggle and struggle again
To show the kids God’s own love.
And along the way, we wouldn’t dare pretend
That the battle is but rough.
They taunt us with punches and venomous hate
Like they’re void of a soul.
They want us to hurt from their own plight of fate
Yet they still pay the toll.
We struggle and struggle and struggle again
To find qualified reason.
And along the way, we pray for the end
Of this difficult season.
We get to feeling like we’ve been darkly positioned
By a fowl perpetrator,
And forget that in fact we’ve been herein commissioned
By the kids’ soul Creator.
We struggle and struggle and struggle again
To gain proper perspective.
And along the way, our memories tend
To be highly selective.
We perceive the heartache of this present time
As the always status-quo,
Forgetting the kids who stopped sin on a dime
When God’s grace made them glow.
We struggle and struggle and struggle again
To attain perseverance.
And along the way, we will not dare bend
From our Godly adherence.
God burdens to set a single soul free
If our hope will unearth it.
To keep fighting this epic fight is the key.
The battle is worth it.
Miracles
I’ve seen You make me wise
When my own tongue was numb.
I’ve seen bread before my eyes
When I didn’t think it would come.
I’ve seen a prayer spoken
Knock demons to the ground.
I’ve seen a child broken
Be turned by You around.
I’ve seen the faith of saints
Heal sickness, death, and pain.
I’ve seen my own complaints
Re-channeled to Your gain.
I’ve seen familial bliss
With one of Your virgin daughters.
I’ve edged the wilderness,
Then seen You part the waters.
I’ve seen a heart perverse
Be saved from wrath infernal.
I’ve seen my life’s reverse
From deathward to eternal.
I’ve seen Your heart in mounds
Which banished every hate.
I’ve seen Your love have bounds
That no man can create.
I’ve seen You, not in stories,
But in my life seen too clearly.
I’ve seen a billion glories
Seen hourly, daily, yearly.
Some hold blind insistence
That chance is all we mean.
But I bank Your existence
On the miracles I’ve seen.
